So, we thought it best to reclaim our name in the richest way possible, by visiting a local fine-dining establishment, one recognizable for its affluent reputation, plus damn good food to-boot. A place that often tips the scale of Italian supremacy with its wine-hoarding nemesis, Vetro 1925. We are lauding Bordinos Restaurant and Wine Bar, of course, who like their rival, is among the best Italian restaurants in terms of food and wine selection.
Our question however: Can Bordinos impress us with its lunch menu? A simple question, you might think, perhaps irrelevant to a restaurant's true greatness. Think again! Faylunchin stands by its founding tenant: if a restaurant has a great lunch menu, with a great price, then there's nothing standing in its way!
And there's nothing standing in our way! On to the review!
Our rating system is structured within four primary categories: Atmosphere, Food, Lunch Bargain, and Service. We base our scores out of a possible ten points per category--typical stuff, we know. But this is where our ratings diverge! Sure, we count up the numbers, but they don't have so much to do with the restaurant's overall score. That, friends, is our pride and joy: a celebrity tribute, where we define a restaurant's personality with a famous person's name. Cool, huh? Ya, we know.
With easily the most recognizable entranceway (not by the name of Hog Haus) on Dickson Street, Bordinos immediately invites you to exit the humdrum regularity of sidewalks and enter a world of tasteful leisure. The lobby, housing a few couches, a TV, and dimmed natural lighting, makes for a smooth transition from waiting on a table into the illustrious dining area.
Since this was lunch, however, Faylunchin was afforded prime seating across from the bar and a scant wait time. We had but a moment to scan the vicinity, enjoying the merlot-hued walls and low hanging lights that seemed constructed from artful paper mâché. Our dining area, roughly one of three areas that wraps around the bar and into the back porch, was composed of four high tops mixed with low tables. It was all delicately spaced, not too jammed, but not so distant that you felt like a farmer in Kansas.
On the stereo, some casual Backstreet Boys crooned our hearts, harkening to those days when it was perfectly normal, sexy even, to frost one's hair-tips and hop around in loose-fitting cargo pants. Rock of the 90s would be a theme, we'd find throughout the meal, and there are worse times in our history than the 90s. Am I right, President Clinton? SCORE 9/10
SCORE 9/10
OMG! We've finally found another Lunch Menu worth talking about! Many times, Faylunchin has visited restaurants that are open for lunch but offer no lunch menu to ceremonialize the experience. It is indeed sad to visit a restaurant that underestimates the afternoon crowd.
But not Bordinos! Like Vetro 1925, Bordinos offers a three-course meal with a variety of choices for salads, soups, entrees, and desserts. If you're feeling peckish but uneasy about a big meal, well then look to Bordinos' Soup & Combo to appease your hunger guilt.
For the trio at Faylunchin, however, we don't shy away from food. Qi is often our captain on that front, most willing to charge into exotic waters, reaping each savory bite before sharing with others.
Qi's Special
Today, Qi purveyed his deeper seafood appetites, ordering an appetizer that is often lost in restaurant blandness. Calamari can seemingly be ordered in any bar nowadays, but instead of receiving squid bits, you may find greasy, brown nuggets on your plate, pilfered from the bottom of a deep frier. We don't want those bottom feeders! Give us real seafood!
And so Bordinos did, offering us Calamari that was flaky and lightly battered, subtly seasoned with Cajun spices and dipped into marinara sauce miles ahead than any microwavable pub paste. We were impressed.
As for entrees, Faylunchin decided not on a three-course meal, but rather on sandwiches, a sure-fire gauge of Bordinos' lunchtime brilliance. After our server enticed us with the day's special, a Grilled Ham, Cheese, and Apple Sandwich served with fries, Harvey was the first to stake claim, as is often the case with the British Empire. Qi happily settled for a Spicy Meatball Sandwich and fries, enjoying the dangly mozzarella cheese before scarfing down his plate in great Qi-like bites. Mike chose a favorite of his, the Monte Christo Sandwich, and was pleasantly surprised to find that, instead of a battered and fried outer shell, Bordino's bread was basted like French Toast, dappled with powdered sugar, then grilled. It came paired with jalapeño jelly and fries.
While we can't say that each bite was an un-paragoned example of exquisiteness, we can admit that each meal was solid, especially for lunch. We can now say that, while Vetro sought to transform lunchtime into something far grander, Bordinos has created a menu that appeases the appetite on a mortal scale. Easily duplicated by them, but hard to master. Next time, we'll have to try their three-course meal. SCORE 8/10
LUNCH BARGAIN The existence of a lunch menu is already a boon in Bordinos' benefit. And we believe that their prices meet our expectations. Aside from Qi who ordered the Calamari, a typical lunch should cost you approximately $10-$13 (which should, we repeat, should include a sizable tip for gracious service). Harvey, who's ticket included no tax, was want to give Bordinos the same score as his final price: $9. Qi and Mike, slightly envious, disagreed. SCORE 7/10 |
Our server, who shall not be identified (other than saying he shares a name with the Indian of the group, and whose name is also on the receipt that we forgot to blur out), was an exceptionally attentive and well-mannered host. There must be a more stringent hiring process when it comes to fine-dining Italian restaurants, because our experiences have always been beyond positive.
Our appetizer was served in under 10 minutes, and our entrees out in approximately 17 minutes. That's fast, even for a quiet Friday afternoon, which signifies that Bordinos is a well-oiled machine with a steady hand on their lunch menu. SCORE 8.5/10
We mentioned earlier that 90s rock was a theme of our meal, but now allow us to delve deeper, explaining how the experience influenced our choice for Bordinos' Overall Score. When listening to good music, music that rekindles a feeling of nostalgia, the listener can often be transported to a happy cerebral place. We at Faylunchin will now refer to this place as "the FAY zone".
Somewhere between the Backstreet Boys and Incubus, the FAY zone appeared, a place without borders, without limitations, where all things cool have a place with all things nerdy. Zack Morris was leaning onto the hood of his 5.0 Mustang, watching Screech and Steve Urkel go to war with a pack of Magic: The Gathering cards. Somewhere above, the music faded in and out, like heavenly breath or the ocean tide.
At some point, the climactic shift in our ethereal daydream, another song came on, another title from the late 80s early 90s. And that song was this...
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